| |
| |
|
All About Debt Relief |
|
|
|
Mr. Cheapies Frugal Budget Tips
So you feel like a hamster spinning your wheel? The faster you run, the faster the wheel spins. Just when you get a raise, you notice the price of hamster wheels jumps! Mr. Cheapie is here with his super-charged budget-cutting tips. One of the biggest wastes of money is restaurant meals. You can cook a meal at home for about 2 cents a plate. Just put leftovers in the microwave, and Presto! Those same leftovers cost a lot more at a restaurant. They call it "the buffet", and they sell it to you for $10.95. Consider also the steak dinner that costs, say, $7 at home. At the restaurant, you pay $13.95 for the same meal. Or, if you want fancy napkins, $39.95. Plus tax. Funny thing about eating at home; you don't pay tax. But step into a restaurant, and guess who jumps in: "Hello, my name is Taxman. I'll be your waiter tonight. Would you like to start with something to drink? Perhaps a very nice glass of wine? That will be 50 cents, plus the price of the wine, of course." "Why would you tax my wine?" Mr. Cheapie wonders. "It's not like the government made it." "Who do you think keeps this country free and safe so that you can enjoy your wine?" Taxman demands. "Do you think Saddam Hussein would let you drink wine if he was still in power?" "I don't see how he could stop me." "Hah!" Taxman replies. "He has spies everywhere. He knows you drink wine and he has targeted this very bottle to self destruct." "Actually, I don't drink wine. His spies must run on the same technology as his scud missiles," Mr. Cheapie muses. "How about a steak dinner?" "An excellent choice," Taxman beams. "That will be $1.73, plus the price of the meal." "Now what?" Mr. Cheapie demands. "Are you saying that Saddam is targeting my steak." "Of course not," Taxman giggles. "We have him locked away. But watch out for North Korea." "Why?" "North Koreans are starving," Taxman explains. "They don't have steaks." "Ah, so the North Korean government wants to take my steak and give it to their citizens." "Not a chance. That would violate the official North Korean policy of starvation for all. They would never feed your steak to the people. But they would hold it up to taunt them," Taxman grins. "Then they would throw it into the fire to fuel a nuclear missile trained on this very table you are sitting at." "Which is why you need to tax my steak." "Exactly," Taxman nods. "It's like a security deposit." "That's right," Taxman smiles. "It's protection money." "You understand," Taxman winks. "It's your tip." "That's what I sa ... no it's not! It's national defense," Taxman insists. At home, you never have to tip the microwave. But, at the restaurant, your waiter expects 15%. Mr. Cheapie has discovered a legal loophole to save 15% on your restaurant bill. According to a national Mr. Cheapie survey, your plate usually has 15% too much food on it. Set aside 15% of your meal. When your waiter comes to collect his tip, pay him in food. Your waiter raved about today's special, so Mr. Cheapie is sure he will appreciate having some for himself. If Taxman is your waiter, don't actually give him the food. Just taunt him with it -- then mail it to North Korea. Then they won't have to blow up your table to get it themselves. Why pay for national defense when the postal service can protect your freedom to eat for just the cost of a stamp? Aren't you glad Mr. Cheapie offers such useful, free advice? About The Author David Leonhardt - sign up for his weekly satire column up at http://www.TheHappyGuy.com/positive-thinking-free-ezine.html or read more columns at http://www.TheHappyGuy.com/self-actualization-articles.html. Join in the happiness at http://www.thehappyguy.com, info@thehappyguy.com
MORE RESOURCES:
Debt-Relief - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Establish Money Saving Goals For Added Success Having something tangible to strive towards can work wonders for your money-saving efforts. To those of you that have already been actively implementing money-saving tips in order to lower your monthly bills, for added inspiration, establish a meaningful goal along with a specific dollar amount. 5 Ways to Get Out of Debt It has been said that everyday more and more people in the world are getting into unsecured debt. Once reason for this is the relative ease in which credit card companies and banks are extending credit to their customers. Bouncing Back from a CCJ Should you be unfortunate enough to face a CCJ - but subsequently succeed in having it either set aside or reversed - the court will automatically remove the entry from the Register of County Court Judgments.The court must send notification of cancellation to the Registry Trust within three days of the date of the order. Is Debt Negotiation Bad? Educating yourself about the ins and outs of debt negotiation is a good first step. Please note that the term 'debt negotiation' is also known as debt arbitration or debt settlement. The Last Debt Solution Should Be Bankruptcy A debt solution like bankruptcy should really only be used as a last possible solution. The problem with this solution of debt problems is that it includes a lot more than simply eliminating debt. Debt Recovery Can be Easy OK, so you are up to your head in debt. You are stressed out, it is now affecting the way you function and absorbing most of your daily thoughts. IVA Advice An IVA (individual voluntary arrangement) is an alternative to bankruptcy introduced by the government as part of the Insolvency Act 1986. This article provides an overview of IVAs and suggests what readers should watch out for when looking for IVA advice. How to Negotiate Debt Settlements Knowing how to negotiate debt settlements is the key to securing your financial future. Debt negotiation is the process where in you will contact your creditors and will appeal to them with an offer to pay off the amount you owe in easier installments that decrease the principal quicker. Get Debt Free If you once have been caught in the debt trap, how do you come out of it and be debt free? We are different and each of us has our own lifestyle and our own financial state, so the way to debt elimination is different from person to person. One plan will be good for some, but not for others. Secrets to Why Debt Reduction is So Vital for Your Financial Health Living with debt is never a good idea if you want to make long-term financial plans. Every cent you use to service debt is money that could have been invested in your future. Student Loans Can't Be Swept Away Through Bankruptcy Bankruptcy is in the news these days, as Congress has finally overhauled the Federal bankruptcy law after years of talking about it. The credit card companies, rightly or wrongly, have been pressuring members of Congress to tighten the bankruptcy statutes, saying that too many people were willfully spending money they couldn't repay with the intention of avoiding paying the money back by filing for bankruptcy. Debt Reduction, a Necessary Endeavour Massive debt is something many Americans face. Debt reduction is now becoming more and more of a necessity. What Is A FICO Score? Your FICO score or credit score as it's commonly called is a very important calculation that can control whether or not you are eligible to receive credit and if eligible the terms you can receive credit under. Failure to understand the impact this score can have on you future purchasing power and lifestyle can be disastrous. Questions to Ask a Credit Counseling Service about Debt Relief Debt relief is a topic on a lot of consumers' minds these days, and with good reason. American credit card debt in 2001 was $692 billion, triple the amount from 1989. Save Money When Going Out It seems as though whenever we go out for the night, it costs much more than we originally intended to spend. Having a 'night on the town' shouldn't cost you a whole weeks salary. Bankruptcy, Is It A Way Out Negotiations with creditors have failed. Repossession is imminent and foreclosure proceedings have begun. Debt Free and Carefree Are you still clearing a mountain of debt amassed last Christmas or even during last year's summer holiday?For those of you who make financial plans, who budget and save, you can skip this article. For those who get a little carried away, who regularly spend more than they can afford, this article is for you. What is Debt Settlement? Debt settlement is the process of negotiating with your creditors so that you are able to pay off a certain percentage of the debt amount that you owe. A debt settlement company will use different types of strategies to negotiate with your creditors so that you get the best outcome. Debt Consolidation and Personal Finances: Learn the Truth! An inability to manage credit, growing debt and bankruptcy are all major problems today. On an average day, over 8,000 people file bankruptcy in the United States alone. New Bankruptcy Law - Where's the Consumer Protection? On April 20, 2005, President Bush signed into law the Bankruptcy Abuse and Consumer Protection Act, a piece of sweeping legislation that brought about the most sweeping changes in personal bankruptcy law in the last quarter century. This bill, which takes effect in October 2005, passed with the overwhelming support of both parties of congress, claims, through its very name, to offer "consumer protection.
|
| home | site map |
| tons-of-articles.com © 2006 |